The Princess and the Pea

I must spend 5 minutes or more every night building a perfect nest to snooze in.

It drives my husband nuts. We have a ridiculous amount of sheet sets, blankets, comforters, mattress pads and pillows. Still, I search for the perfect combination every time I change the sheets. He has given up trying to help me change our bed but still insists on voicing opinions; "It's too early to switch to cotton blankets! Keep the wool one on!". But neither is chosen - I go for the summer-weight down duvet instead. He sighs and leaves the room. It's Going To Be A Long Night.

Then there is the Search For the Two Perfect Pillows 'O The Night. Only the children's pillows are safe from being snatched out from under their heads. I spend a few minutes flopping around, trying both sides. Then I start snooting around for the Chosen Knee Pillow for the night. It has to be thin, with the right case. (Flannel is too hot.) Some nights, I want a pillow for my back. Another search ensues.

Then there's the foot issue: How can you sleep on your back with your toes held prisoner by the covers?! I wish someone would invent a cover holder that provided that perfect amount of space for one's toes to rest unencumbered by the tucked sheets. If I pull the covers free from tucking under the mattress, I get tangled up like a shroud during the night, causing me to flail and practically hyperventilate. (I suspect it's my control-issue thing, but let's not go there this early in the morning.)

Does anybody have the perfect bedding, perfect mattress, perfect pillow?! Am I just nuts?

And CRAP! The down duvet wasn't the right choice - he was right. Back to the wool blanket, which I had put into the dry-cleaning pile. I noticed that youngest's bed looks like a rat's nest again this morning, too. He has inherited the neurotic-bedding gene by osmosis! ACK!