So, yesterday was my annual check up, forced upon me courtesy of the pharmaceutical industry. I like my doctor; she's all about alternative medicine and tries everything natural before whipping out the prescription pad. She also has her office in a converted bungalow which she remodeled with her own two hands. And her gay brother is her receptionist, and the guy is a scream (and totally nonintentional - he just is funny).
But -- pap smears are just Not Fun. Especially when you bring your very active 6 year old with you, WITH the portable DVD player and a current favorite movie. Trouble is, the boy zips through the movie double quick by fast forwarding to his favorite parts. Then he starts exploring. There is a lovely wrap-around porch that he is told by the receptionist brother he may visit. So he strolls around and sings and talks to himself. Then, he notices the exam room windows. So, just in case his mother might be in there, he raps out Shave-and-a-haircut two-bits very nicely, on the window; you know, just friendly like and because he is connected to his mother by ESP and great love. So, in the middle of my pelvic exam, I say to dear Dr. Gloria, who has a young son of her own, "May we pause here, and may I go rap back?" So up I jump, nekkid derriere and all, and give the dum-diddly-ump bump, bump bump right back to him. He yelps "MOMMY!" and all is right with his world.
And I hop back on the table and we get on with the business at hand.
And wouldn't you know, my blood pressure was better than it's been in 15 years.